Social Media Surveillance: What Your Ex’s Lawyer Is Looking For

Social media has become so prominent in the life of many Americans that their first instinct — once a major life event occurs — is to announce it on their platform of choice. Whether you favor Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, or any other service, the pervasive presence of social media can pose significant challenges during a divorce. Even the most innocent post can be scrutinized or misinterpreted in a way that harms your case. Divorce lawyers know this, and it’s likely that the attorney for your ex will be monitoring your online activity to gain an advantage. 

There are many potential problems that can arise if you are not careful about social media during your divorce. Before putting something online, you should remember the following:

• Blasting your ex won’t help — While it’s natural to experience a range of emotions during a divorce, airing grievances on social media platforms is ill-advised. Negative posts about your ex can be used by their legal team to demonstrate erratic behavior, excessive hostility, or an unwillingness to cooperate, which may influence aspects of custody or property disputes. Even if you have ironclad proof that your ex cheated on you, that in and of itself likely won’t lead to more favorable divorce terms.
• Avoid references to lavish spending — Some people feel a sense of freedom when they’ve decided to end their marriage. They might go on a spending spree or take a lavish vacation to celebrate. One photo in a luxurious setting could undermine your effort to secure spousal support, or alimony, or an appropriate division of marital property. 
• Keep the kids off your feed — Maintaining your children’s privacy is paramount. Sharing their experiences or feelings regarding the divorce on social media might not only breach their privacy but also become a focal point in custody discussions, with opposing counsel arguing that you’re engaging in improper activity with them, or alienating them from your ex. 
• Be very careful about a new relationship —Perhaps you’re one of the lucky people who found the right person shortly after your marriage effectively ended. Though you might be tempted to shout it to the world, going “Instagram official” with your new relationship presents several possible risks. You could face allegations that the affair started earlier and that you used marital funds to keep it going. There might also be questions about how the new person in your life might affect your finances and your ability to be an attentive parent. This is particularly true in custody disputes if the judge is concerned about your new partner’s effect on your child’s physical or emotional well-being. 

Please exercise extreme caution and mindful discretion with all social media activities during your divorce process. Consulting with your legal counsel for guidance on managing your online presence can help protect your interests and ensure your social media use does not adversely affect your divorce proceedings. Remember, taking a break from these platforms during this period may be your best course of action, providing you with the space needed to navigate the transition with minimal external disruption.

At The Henry Law Firm P.A., we are experienced Kansas lawyers who advise on social media discretion and all other aspects of Kansas divorces. Please call 913-381-5020 or contact us online to schedule your consultation. Our office is in Overland Park.